Sunday, July 25, 2010

Breaking Free

These are the rules that have to be broken by all Co Dependents. This should be fun!

  • Don't feel or talk about feelings.
  • Don't think, figure things out, or make decisions - you probably don't know what you want or what's best for you.
  • Don't identify, mention, or solve problems - it's not okay to have them.
  • Be good, right, perfect, and strong.
  • Don't be who you are because that's not good enough.
  • Don't be selfish, put yourself first, say what you want and need, say no, set boundaries, or take care of yourself - always take care of others adn never hurt their feelings or make them angry.
  • Don't have fun, be silly or enjoy life - it costs money, makes a noise, isn't necessary and (makes you look stupid.) added by me.
  • Don't trust yourself, your Higher Power, the process of life or certain people - instead put your faith in untrustworthy people; then act surprised when they let you down.
  • Don't be open, honest, and direct - rather hint, manipulate, get others to talk for you, guess what they want and need and expect them to do the same for you.
  • Don't get close to people - it isn't safe.
  • Don't disrupt the system by growing or changing.
You cannot set boundaries, and take responsibility for the way others feel at the same time.
Beyond Codependency - Melody Beattie.

It is never too late to change I am just a little sad that I didn't know all this years ago. But what the heck, it is now or never.

1 comment:

Diane said...

I hear you, Caryl. I read those words from Melody too. I think she said they have probably been pasted on the refrigerator in dysfunctional homes.

Yes, rules NOT to be followed!
Hugs, Diane